Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Daily Top 5>>> 7/1/08

  • "Maury Povich" - Maurice Richard Povich is a misunderstood man. All he's tried to do is help underserved people like those to the left figure out why their children look more like the lawn guy than the "father", get nagging, obese gold-diggers off the back of men who work hard to budget their food stamps, and educate the public on how to distinguish drag queens from ugly women. Looks like Maury/Muhhree/Murray/Mo-ree deserves a little more credit. I mean, who else could spend 10 years on the air dealing with such needy people on a daily basis. Maury > Jerry Springer.

  • "Averages" - I don't understand why I can never stomach the inevitable sub .200 averages so common in baseball's early months. The target of the bulk of my anger this year was Nick Swisher, one of the new guys on the Good Guys. Until June, Swish wasn't even hitting his weight. And when he did hit the ball, it was usually into an inning-ending 6-4-3 double play. Well, over the past 4 games Nick Swisher has 3 homers, including two grand slams. Plus he's hit around .330 in June. I'm just taking the opportunity to apologize to Mr. Swisher......Mrs. Swisher, Grandpa and Grandma Swisher, and his kids too. Sorry.
  • "Zshare.net" - My favorite file hosting site. It's free, unlike Rapidshare. There are no limits, unlike Rapidshare. And there are no passwords. I just downloaded the new Cool Kids mixtape as a matter of fact. Took all of 3 minutes. Don't Google Image "zshare" though. I made that mistake while searching for their logo and all that popped up was softcore pornography.
  • "School Supplies" - Back in the day, school supply shopping day was a joyous day. A day of celebration. Christmas/Hanukkah/I guess Kwanzaa 2.0. On a late August afternoon, you smile your way to Target and rummage through the Power Ranger, Blues Clues, and Sonic the Hedgehog stationary that the suburban and catholic school kids left in their wake. Corporate American taught us early on the value of making yourself the target of envy and petty theft by purchasing cheaply made crap. Well, times have changed. Instead of a solar-powered calculator, Medill requires a brand new laptop from me. Instead of pens and pencils, I need a digital camera. Instead of a box of 128 crayons with built-in sharpener, I gotta buy a digital, hard-drive based camcorder. On second thought, I guess not that much has changed after all.
  • "Granola" - The perfect snack, breakfast, lunch, dinner, 4th meal, whatever. Throw it in some yogurt, toss in some fruit, and you've got a heaping helping of crunchiness to hold you for 4-5 hours. I eat it pretty much every day. My pantry looks more like it should be in a horse stable than a kitchen believe me. I don't do the nuts though. Quaker especially, they try to sneak in thin slices of almonds and other unwanted legumes. I frown on that. I'm old enough to discern a raisin or dried mango piece from a nut.

1 comment:

Vanessa said...

i see no poll. i'm disappointed. Some granalo sneaks in coconut too! which im allergic to so that's no fun. I love Maury. He's the maaaaaaan. Who's Jerry Springer again?